Monday, September 10, 2012

Posted Without (Much) Comment

So, Colorado State University has posted an ad for a tenure-track Assistant Professor of English position, to start in the fall of 2012.

Great news, huh? A tenure-track position in English!!!! An opportunity for one of those English Ph.D.s who've been toiling in crappy adjunct positions for the past five years to finally break through and get the kind of job they've been working towar ......

.... Wait a minute.

From the text of the ad (emphasis mine):
Required qualifications:
1. Ph.D. in English or American Studies or closely related area awarded between 2010 and time of appointment.
Yep, folks, that's right. If your Ph.D. is more than 2 years old, go jump off a cliff.

So nevermind, long-term adjuncts or lecturers. Colorado State doesn't want you.

Nevermind, people who were told that if you just take that adjunct gig and hang on for three or four years, you'll be a better candidate for a tenure track job. Colorado State is here to tell you that loyally working at a temporary job for 3 or 4 years actually renders you unemployable. Oops, sorry.

Nevermind, people who had the bad luck to graduate during the particularly bad job market years of 2008 and 2009. Colorado State thinks you should've just hung on a little longer. Because as everyone knows, a doctorate granted in 2009 is worthless, while one granted in 2010 is awesome.

You know what, Colorado State? Screw you.

I have no more words. Academia has finally rendered me mute with shock and anger.


(h/t for the link to Lawyers, Guns, and Money.)


  1. And people wonder why we leave the teaching profession/academy for greener pastures. What an utter load of shit.

  2. Hahahah! That's priceless. Since I meet the criteria but am done with the academic job market forever, maybe I should have some fun burning bridges and send in a fake application full of satire and ridicule that let's them know EXACTLY what they can do with their precious job. It would almost be worth the effort to sign a letter to this search committee "Kiss my ass."

  3. Some interesting commentary here (one of the academic blogs I still follow) and and here (IHE).

    1. Thanks! I am gonna collect my thoughts and will probably post a followup on this tomorrow.

      I have to admit, I'm a little surprised at how much this has infuriated me. I'm not in English, I never graduated, I wasn't an adjunct ... but, damn. This kind of thing should not be part of the bargain we all strike when we go into grad school. There are no guarantees of good jobs for everyone, of course ... but this kind of thing is just not fair.

  4. I'm thinking about switching jobs and looking for a change. But if I decided to do that, that means I would have to sacrifice my family. Ex: relocation,school,and happiness. But, their is a catch. You want to know how much you'll be making before you take that big leap. I've been told that you should never ask how much the salary is until your foot is in the door but then again, I want to know if it's even worth quitting the "old" job and go with the new. I hate to be in a situation making lesser than what I'm making now. Don't get me wrong its a good paycheck but more would be better. Any suggestions ???