I Don't Think We're Saying What You Think We're Saying

So ... while I've been away taking care of work things and life things and computer things, it appears that my blog has gotten tangentially caught up in an academic/postacademic brouhaha.

It started when Amy Pistone, a Classics Ph.D. student at the University of Michigan posted this article (under the official U of M grad school masthead! Neato!!), instructing all of us in the postacademic world (and particularly those in the humanities) to sit down and shut up and stop talking, because she really really loves her work and that's all that matters. Not the crappy academic job market in the humanities, not the fact that grad school is something that a lot of people find depressing and demoralizing, and not the fact that there are a huge number of people out here who are reading and commenting (note: check out the years-long comment threads after each of those posts) and obviously gaining some value from those of us who are out here "writing these sorts of articles about grad students" that she doesn't like.

Sigh.

When I first noticed the traffic coming over from her article and skimmed it, I wasn't going to bother to respond. We postacademics get pushback from time to time, and I've got thick skin. And I'll be honest - when I glanced through Pistone's piece, my thoughts were basically: "mmmhmmm ... sure. Go ahead and vent, my dear ... but let's revisit this in five years and see how you feel then." Then I went on about my day.

But yesterday, I saw Rebecca Schuman's open letter to Amy Pistone, in which she expresses similar feelings to mine:

Do I dislike you, personally, Amy Pistone, even though you have misunderstood the dark humor in an article I wrote [...]? No, on the contrary, you remind me of a far more earnest version of myself at your stage (I’d say “at your age,” but I spent seven years working in the private sector between college and grad school, which is more than two, in case you’re wondering).

No, my reaction to you, personally, is “Oh, bless her heart—she’ll learn soon enough.”

(It was apparently Schuman's piece in Slate from earlier this year that inspired Pistone's university-sanctioned* temper tantrum.)

Reading Schuman's response inspired me to go back and read Pistone's article more closely. And boy, am I glad I did. Because now that I've read her post in full, I feel compelled to respond to what are clear and notable misrepresentations of my writing on this blog.

Law Students are Catching On ... Why Aren't Ph.D. Students?

A friend linked to this article on Facebook today, and I wanted to bring it over here for discussion.

The article in question is about law school applications, so it might not seem completely relevant to a blog about leaving a Ph.D. program. After all, law is a profession. Aren't those people who enroll in professional programs like law schools the smart ones? The ones who thought about more than "I like books and writing and teaching; I'll go do that for ten more years!" after undergrad ... and instead thought "I'd like to be a lawyer, so I think I'll go to law school"

Aren't law students who enrolled in their programs when we enrolled in ours the ones who have awesome real jobs now, while we Ph.D. students struggle along in adjuncthood or at a shitty tenure-track job we can't seem to publish our way out of at Nowhereseville State College?

Well, not exactly. Not at all, actually. As the data clearly shows job opportunities for law school graduates have been sharply declining in recent years ... just as more and more new grads with shiny law degrees have been arriving on the market. Meanwhile, law schools are being accused of stretching the truth on their employment statistics in order to attract new students ... and of then shrugging their shoulders when most of their students graduate without job offers.

And (in my opinion, the worst trend of all) law students typically graduate with a debt load that dwarfs the ones that we Ph.D. students rack up. There are few scholarships or work/study programs available to law students, so many (if not most) wind up graduating with $150,000-$200,000 in student loan debt ... for just three years of school.

Workin' and Schoolin' Together ... A Good Idea?

In the comments at one of her terrific recent posts about the economics of graduate school, Lauren and I got into a bit of a discussion about money and academia. Lauren's post was about the tendency among grad students (including the two of us!) to take on more and more student loan debt as they progress through school, simply to help pay for life's necessities. In her post, she notes that this seems to be an accepted part of grad school for many students ... and she thinks this is a really big problem.

I agree on both counts. Taking on additional debt isn't seen as an irresponsible thing to do among most grad students, and there is little concern about how much we're accruing or how we're actually going to pay all of it back. That's ridiculous. And this is all done with the full blessing of our advisors and departments, who are either deluded about or deliberately ignoring the bleak academic job market that lies ahead for us. That's bordering on criminal. (I'm exaggerating, but only slightly).

So in the end (as I've alluded to in my series on privilege in academia) you wind up with a bunch of students who graduate with massive piles of debt ... many of whom will be unable to find jobs that will pay enough to allow them to pay off the debt before they retire. In other words, a whole lot of graduating Ph.D. students are starting their careers off in dire financial straits and saddling themselves with debt loads in the tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars, with no idea of what job prospects await them (hint: not good ones).

So this is a problem that requires a solution, because this system is unsustainable. With the collapsing job market, students cannot keep taking on more and more debt as their job prospects become more and more bleak. Something needs to change.

Just In Case Anyone's Wondering...

...Seventeen months. That's how long it took anyone at my department to notice I was gone.

Well, anyone who hadn't run into me out on the town, that is. In the interest of full disclosure, I've seen a few faculty members out and about and have given them updates on my situation. But I still haven't heard from my advisor since December 2010, and at no point in the past 17 months has anyone from my department contacted me to see if I was still working on my dissertation, if I needed anything, whether I had found a job, etc. Nothing.

I purposely waited to officially notify them that I was dropping out, by the way. Since my advisor was not communicative and I still wanted to stay "enrolled" for this academic year to defer my student loans, I figured I had nothing to gain by announcing to anyone that I was leaving before this academic year. And after a few more months passed and no one had checked up on me (other than to ask me to teach, of course), I decided that I wanted to see how long it would take them to notice I was gone. Or if they ever would.

And now I have my answer. Seventeen months. It took them seventeen months to drop me a quick email to see how/what I was doing.

Let's put that in perspective: I could have carried and birthed two children during this time frame.

My department is clearly not illustrative of every department in the world, but I urge you to think about this. If your advisor wasn't checking up on you, how long would it take your department to actually notice your absence?

If I stopped showing up at my current job, it probably wouldn't take a full day for my boss and coworkers to check on me. If I didn't show up for a second day? They'd probably drive by my house. Three days? They'd probably call the cops.

Now, of course, graduate school is different than my current job ... you're not on campus every day, and you don't see everyone every day. But still ..... seventeen months??? From a department that is supposed to be mentoring you and advising you and helping you out every step of the way until you find a real job?

I mean, I know I was nothing more than teaching fodder for them, but still.......

In Which I Become Angry on Behalf of Someone Else

I've recently written that these days, I only find myself angry or bitter about academia when I hear about other people who are struggling or being treated badly. Most of the time, I just work and go home and live my life. But at other times, I find myself furious with academia all over again.

Today is one of those latter times. Let me share the story with you...

I had a drink Friday night with a couple of people from my former grad program - one good friend, and two other grad students who I don't know very well but who I do like, and who have been very supportive (or at least not openly disdainful) of my decision to leave.

One of the acquaintance grad students was a little stressed. Okay, a lot stressed.

(I'm going to refer to this student as Joe, just for the ease of telling this story. You should not assume that Joe is their real name, or that they are male. Although they might be.)

When I arrived at the bar Friday evening, Joe immediately started talking about how stressed out he was - almost before I even had the chance to say hi and ask how he was. As it turns out, he was overwhelmed. He's teaching a class, taking two others, working on a book review, doing data analysis that wasn't going well for a journal article, is ten days away from taking his written comp exam after a year of reading for it, and trying to think of ideas for his dissertation. If you're counting, that's seven distinct things taking up his time and energy this month.

On the day that we met, he had just delivered a presentation to a departmental seminar, which was arranged by his advisor. (Thing #8 for this month!) He was dressed up in his "presentation clothes," and as I sat there sipping my beer in my casual clothes (we don't have to dress up at work), he started talking about how he wished that he could just relax after work like a normal person. And that he was going to have to go home after we left the bar and work some more. And again ... he mentioned how stressed he was.

Posted Without Comment

You know how people say that the various social science job markets aren't as bad as the humanities markets? And that the market might even be "rebounding" after a few down years?

I was emailing with a friend who's still a grad student in my old department at Grad U this afternoon. Zie informed me of the following:

(1) Of the ten students on the market this year from our top-ten social science department, only two got tenure-track jobs. (Another got an instructor position as a spousal hire). Two other people have already been working on temporary contracts, but failed to get a tenure-track job this year despite applying widely. So 70% of the people on the market this year will be back on it next year ... along with all of the new first-timers.

I've been around Grad U Department for nine years, and in those nine years I have known exactly three people who didn't get a job on their first run at the academic job market - and perhaps five or six more who took very undesirable temporary jobs as a desperation move. But never, ever have I seen a year where more than one student was unemployed this late in April. This year ... seven.

And for the record, all of these people have impressive CVs with good publications and teaching experience. These are not academic slouches taking a "test run" at the market.

(2) According to my friend, the department is now giving the advanced students a hard time about funding for next year. Our department has always been very good about funding its advanced students, especially if they were willing to teach and/or were on their job market year. This is apparently no longer the case. These students who didn't get jobs this year are also being told by the department that they will likely not be funded by Grad U any longer.

(3) Just today, the department sent out its excited, self-congratulatory email, announcing the names of the full, normal-sized cohort of first-year students they have admitted for the 2012-13 school year.

Does anyone else see anything wrong with this picture?????

Postacademic Rant 7 - On Academic Seminars

I am swamped at work (yes, I'm going to take the raise - still negotiating with my boss) and don't have any ideas for new posts right now ... but I don't want to leave you all hanging for more than a week with nothing new! So I thought I'd post another postacademic rant for you.

Standard disclaimers: these were written about a year ago when I was freshly dealing with my anger at academia and was working through my feelings with a therapist. I don't really feel this strongly about most of this stuff now ... although I certainly don't denounce any of the thoughts or emotions expressed in these posts, either. :)

This one will probably be more relevant to folks who are earlier in their grad programs - people who are still mired in coursework, or who are at the phase in their grad student careers where their cohort-mates line up eagerly to go to every Friday seminar and take notes excitedly on whatever topic Famous Scholar X is dishing about that week.

(Notes that will simply migrate home to your office, to sit on top of the other piles of notes from presentations you listened to that had absolutely no bearing on the work you're doing or the research you're interested in or anything else relevant to you. And yet, you have to hang onto them forever and ever and ever, filed away in some cabinet. After all, they represent academic work!!)

It's titled, appropriately, F*ck Your Pointless, Endless Seminars... language NSFW. Obviously. :)

A Little Light Reading..

I'm battling a pretty nasty head cold and a heavier-than normal workload this week (which is, needless to say, a really awesome combination), so substantive posting and responding to emails/comments is going to be a little bit light for the next few days.

But I didn't want to leave you all hanging all week long with nothing of substance to read! I was originally going to post another postacademic rant for you, but instead I thought I'd post a link to this discussion between a group of professors and a career advisor at the University of Chicago, discussing what humanities Ph.D. programs can and should do for their students, given the lack of academic jobs available to graduating Ph.D.s.

As always, I'm happy to see people talking about these issues. The jobs crisis in academia is a real thing that is not going away, and any indication that faculty are at least thinking and talking about the jobs crisis and how to respond to it is a good thing, in my opinion.

But of course, even in this piece that is clearly and obviously about nonacademic career planning, you have to have the requisite professor claiming that they're doing all they need to do by training Ph.D. students to do nothing more than write academic manuscripts. That somehow the knowledge that they gain while completing a traditional academic Ph.D. will be enough to send them off into the nonacademic job market, where they'll have the pick of any job they want. Sigh.

A Worthwhile Petition?

So, this petition was being passed around my Facebook wall yesterday by several of my grad student friends. Apparently, a group (presumably of grad students) is trying to push the US Government to make graduate student stipends tax-exempt once again, so that people could deduct their graduate income off their taxes like a mortgage interest deduction ... presumably since going to grad school is something that is presumed to be a Good Thing for people to do, that we should incentivize people to do in larger numbers by offering tax exemptions.

They're about halfway to their goal for signatures ... so if you agree with their mission, go ahead and sign. No guarantees, of course, but the White House has promised to at least consider moving on petitions that reach their signature goal. So you never know.

I won't be signing, though. I genuinely think that with the horrible academic job market and the rising proportion of contingent faculty teaching at the university level (not to mention the people who are miserable once they arrive in grad school but don't think they can leave thanks to academic culture), the very last thing that we need to be doing is encouraging more people to go to grad school. While it's (on the surface) an objectively Good Thing to encourage people to get more education, I'm not convinced that providing a tax incentive to encourage more people to pursue Ph.Ds is a good thing.

People coming out of undergrad into low-paid entry-level jobs have it tough, certainly. An advanced degree such as a practical masters' degree might help with that. But I don't think that subsidizing people further to spend a decade pursuing a humanities or social science Ph.D. is a good idea at all. While low-paid entry level jobs do suck, I think that graduating Ph.D.s who are in their 30s and 40s and who see only adjuncthood ahead of them with no job training behind them have it far worse. So I won't be signing the petition. In fact, I'd sort of like to sign an anti-petition. Perhaps someone could sponsor one that would double-tax graduate stipends?? Then, maybe, we'd have a more reasonable number of graduate students who could ultimately pursue the small number of tenure-track jobs that are out there...

I'm only half kidding. :)

(Of course, I also don't have the guts to post this as a comment on Facebook ... thank god I have a blog. :)

The AHA Says "No More Plan B"

Like many others, I was pleased to see the recent statement from the AHA urging history graduate departments to do a better job in training their students for nonacademic careers. The statement calls for grad programs to do two simultaneous things: to expand their graduate training to include an emphasis on skills and careers outside of academia, and to stop characterizing nonacademic careers as "alternatives" or "plan Bs."

This statement was made in large part due to AHA's recognition that the job market in history is not facing a "transient 'crisis," but that tenure track jobs are disappearing and that "we owe it to our students and to our profession to think more broadly."

Their statement is getting attention in the blogsophere and positive feedback at Inside Higher Ed. I'm, obviously, very pleased to see that. It probably won't shock any of my readers to hear that I support graduate programs training their students for nonacademic careers ... not as a fallback "Plan B," but as a different yet completely valid career choice.

So I think the AHA statement is a wonderful first step, and I would like to see other professional organizations follow suit ... and graduate departments follow up by actually beginning to implement their recommendations.

Good Luck!

Today is the first day of classes at Grad U for the fall semester. I assume that for many of you who are reading here who are still in academia, this week (or perhaps next) is the start of your semester as well.

I just wanted to put up a quick post today wishing you all good luck with the start of the new semester ... as well as to remind you that if you continue being unhappy or dissatisfied with your academic life as the semester goes on, you are not alone. In the last 24 hours alone, several people have found this blog through searches for "I'm unhappy in graduate school," "hate grad school," and "tired of grad school want to leave."

If everyone around you seems bright-eyed and bushy-tailed but you can't muster up similar enthusiasm, it's okay. You're not the only one feeling this way, even if no one around you is admitting to it.

Just get through each day, and keep in mind that you have options. You can choose to leave if you want. Academia is a job ... nothing more, nothing less. It doesn't own you, and the fact that you started down this path doesn't mean that you can't change courses and careers if you want to or need to.

I'm not the least bit upset that I'm not teaching or going to research meetings this week. My current job may not be groundbreakingly interesting, but I'm honestly just thrilled that today is just another average work day for me ... and that after 5pm, my evenings are free for me to do whatever I choose with.

There will always be opportunities to teach a class or to do some independent research if I so choose. But being outside of the academic machine feels great. If you feel like you need to leave, get the process started.

And it seems like as good of a time as any to mention that if you're a grad student who is feeling really hopeless and desperate, or who is having thoughts of suicide ... there is a dedicated hotline out there for graduate students who need help. Call 1-800-GRADHLP anytime to speak to someone who understands what you're going through and wants to help.

Good luck with the new semester!

Your Wednesday Funny

In honor of the upcoming Labor Day holiday ... a relevant Ph.D. comic:

Source: http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=1338

Last Labor Day, I spent the entire day frantically typing cover letters and getting job market packets ready to mail on Tuesday. My partner grilled burgers outside while I sat in my study, working, and only came out once dinner was ready. I don't even think I went outside, all day long.

This Labor Day, I will be getting paid for the day even though I don't have to go into the office - I get holiday pay now!! I'm not sure what my exact plans will be, but I hope to be on the water somewhere, relaxing. If that fails, I'll be at a barbeque ... actually enjoying the weather, food, drink, and conversation for once.

I swear, I think the part that I like best about making this change has been reclaiming my free time. Don't get me wrong - I'm still working a 40 hour week, every week. But the difference is that when I'm not at work, no one expects me to be working. The change in my mental state has been astounding.

Policy Changes

So it appears that per our new federal debt deal, graduate students may no longer be able to obtain subsidized student loans to pay for grad school. In other words, if you take out a federal loan to fund your graduate studies, you will be charged interest during the time you are in school rather than having it accrue only once you've graduated. Long-term, then, graduate students will pay more in student loans than they currently are.

Hmm. I'm of two minds about this. First, I think graduate students get screwed enough as it is, between the lack of job training and the horrifying job market and the shift toward adjunct/temporary faculty in higher education. So this just seems like one more kick in the rear to anyone who decides to go to grad school without realizing all of the potential downsides.

On the other hand, though, I really oppose people taking out more than a nominal amount of student loans to pay for graduate study (I'm speaking from experience, here), so I'm having trouble getting too worked up about a change in policy that may prevent graduate students from taking out more and more student loans to fund their studies.

Thoughts, anyone?

Infographic on Getting a Ph.D.

Wow ... here it is, all in one place - the REAL story of what the Ph.D. experience is like for most of us.

Look at this, and decide for yourself if these tradeoffs are worth it for you.

Structural Problems in Higher Ed? What Problems??? Welcome to Grad School!

Just got an email from my department chair at Grad U, announcing that they have officially admitted a full cohort of students to the program again next year. This, during a time of budget cuts, shrinking class schedules, and shrinking stipends and assistantship opportunities for students ... as well as an era boasting a job market with few offerings and a system of higher education where more than half of all college-level courses are now taught by adjuncts.

But they admit a full 16-student cohort again, with an excited email talking about "how much important work these new scholars will be doing for us!"

Your Tuesday Funny

From a brilliant commenter at the latest post* at "100 Reasons Not to Go To Grad School," regarding the problem of unstructured time during grad school (which can leave you either never working or constantly working). Regarding the work schedule in grad school under unlimited unstructured time:

"Step 1: allow your unstructured time to run wild like a mustang
Step 2: suffer from an incredibly acute and debilitating panic attack
Step 3: regain composure long enough to get some stuff done
Step 4: REPEAT"

"Anonymous" who left the comment ... if by some small chance you also read here, you are a genius.

Readers: this is unbelievably true, and exactly what it feels like to work in grad school. You will slack off for a few days, then suffer through an insane bout of guilt, panic, and likely a crying attack or two where you will beat yourself up for being the worst grad student ever. Then you'll steel your resolve, sit down, and get a couple things done. And will pat yourself on the back.

And the next week, you'll take one evening off to catch up on reruns of your favorite show, and the cycle will repeat itself.

This is normal for grad studenting ... but not normal for real life. Just an FYI.


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*If you are reading here and have not bookmarked the "100 Reasons" blog, do so immediately. And when you have time, read through the archives.

Reason I'm Leaving #6: I Need Tangible Outcomes

This reason is one that crept up on me, I'll admit it. I've mentioned periodically that I loved grad school for awhile, and grew to hate it only once my MA and my qualifying exams were over.

I think part of that reason was because it was at that point that the day-to-day, tangible outcomes of the work I was doing generally disappeared. I've hinted at this before, but it's time to give this reason its own post.

Reason I'm Leaving #5: I'm Tired of Begging

One thing that I didn't realize when I was applying to graduate school was that I was signing myself up for a once- or twice-a-year battle in which I would be begging multiple faculty, departments, and funding agencies to allow me to continue doing my job for another semester or year.

When I was accepted into graduate school, I (like most others in my department) was told that we had guaranteed funding for X years. This was an unusually generous funding offer for sure (guaranteed funding for multiple years is definitely NOT the norm in many grad programs), and I immediately settled into the program.

Within a few months, two things became obvious from observing others in my department: (1) competitive fellowships were seen as far superior to regular departmental assistantships, since you didn't have to do as much work for other people, and (2) as long as you were willing to teach, the department would fund you for longer than X years to compensate you for your labor.

I was thrilled about this. See, I first and foremost wanted to be a college teacher. So from observing older graduate students in my department, I deduced that once I finished with coursework and started my dissertation, I would be able to teach and teach to my heart's content until I finished my dissertation. In other words, from watching other graduate students, it seemed obvious that the department would "hire" me to teach when I was ABD, and that I could continue that for several years if need be. I very distinctly remember one of my grad student colleagues teaching two courses per semester during her last year. "Well, obviously there are plenty of classes available and I'll always be able to teach," I thought.

Well, not exactly. Not by the time I advanced in the program 4-5 years later.

I applied to a fellowship in my second year and won it, but to my surprise found that my X years of departmental funding was reduced by the number of years I was on the fellowship, rather than being added on at the end (so that my funding period was X+2 years). At the same time, the department began admitting more graduate students and reducing the number of classes that were offered to undergrads, which meant that more students were competing for fewer teaching slots. Thus, the #2 condition mentioned above was no longer available - I couldn't teach the same class year after year to pay my way through school anymore.

So rather than making a low but livable wage teaching in my department while I finished writing, I spent the last several years of my program begging - literally begging - for a teaching assignment. I was an excellent teacher with excellent evaluations who regularly taught overenrolled class. But the department had apparently decided that while my older advanced colleagues had been dedicated and skilled teachers who were an asset to the department by teaching full classes to enthusiastic evaluations, me being in the same situation 3 years later meant I was a lazy freeloader who was unworthy of a teaching assignment.

I've heard similar stories from multiple people in various departments across disciplines. As states cut higher education budgets departments have been cutting their course offerings accordingly - but for some reason, they do not cut down the size of their incoming graduate cohorts. At the same time, outside funding agencies are cutting back on the amount of money they have available for fellowships and scholarships due to the economic downturn.

Should You Go to Graduate School? Part 2

Somehow I've never run across this essay before, written by Professor Timothy Burke at Swarthmore College.

However, yes to all of it. If you're thinking about going to graduate school, you should know that it's not just "more college." It's not just an innocent opportunity for you to continue your undergraduate education. There is a culture that is hard to describe to people who haven't experienced it. But this essay does a better job than most things I've seen at describing (1) why graduate school isn't for everyone and (2) how hard it will be to leave if you decide to.

Thanks, Professor Burke.

Should You Go to Graduate School?

I mentioned in the last post that recently I've had a number of people ask me for my opinion on whether others should go to graduate school. Two weekends ago, I ran into the younger brother of a former high school friend, who said that my career change had him second-guessing his goal of pursuing a Ph.D. And last weekend, an intern at my partner's company asked me for advice because she is considering going to graduate school to pursue a Ph.D. in the same field I'm in right now. Every now and then, I get emails from people looking for information about our graduate program and asking whether they should go to grad school.

Well.

First of all, clearly I'm biased. I've become very disillusioned and disappointed recently, and thus am undoubtedly more cynical about whether someone should go to graduate school than the average person.

On the other hand, though, I think that some cynicism is appropriate. I think that college faculty are far too eager to encourage their undergraduate students to pursue graduate degrees. And the public in general knows so little about the nature of academic jobs and the state of the job market that young people who are considering graduate school get very little useful advice about whether they should go to grad school.

I know that for me, there was never any practical discussion of what the academic job market looked like, or indeed what a career in academia would look like. I was young and naive, and had no idea that working in X field would be different than studying it in college. And my parents unquestioningly encouraged me, saying that "more education is always good."

I'm certainly not blaming any of those people - my parents or my undergraduate advisors - for the position I'm in now. I was an adult, and could have done my own research.

But that's the thing. Rather than encouraging potential grad students to do careful research, we just continue encouraging promising students to apply to graduate school as if future jobs and happiness are guaranteed. And that would be fine, if graduate school were like a normal job.

But it's not. What these kids will experience is (likely) a move to a different part of the country, social isolation from people outside academia, very low pay and few benefits, and very likely a lack of discussion of any career options outside the academy.

So ... do I think people should go to graduate school?

Well ... maybe. I certainly don't think people shouldn't go, if they're excited about it and sure it's what they want.

However, I do think they need to make sure their decision is a well-informed and practical one. So along those lines, I have some advice for anyone considering pursuing graduate education (in any field, but particularly in the humanities and social sciences).