tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3282788798018689873.post2938002078463077264..comments2024-03-12T03:41:35.856-04:00Comments on From Grad School to Happiness: Even though...JChttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04468758055878600762noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3282788798018689873.post-50697826089513508472018-11-27T19:06:51.118-05:002018-11-27T19:06:51.118-05:00"Even though I’m a far better partner and fri..."Even though I’m a far better partner and friend now that I don’t have constant stress and guilt hanging over my head about the work I *should* be doing…"<br /><br />This. So much this. I haven't left and don't know whether I will, but I feel every single day that grad school interferes far too much with my ability to be a devoted partner, daughter, and friend. My husband cooks almost all of our meals and does most of the cleaning because I'm too preoccupied filling my "flexible work hours" with a pattern of work and guilt-inducing procrastination (see: what I'm doing right now). He tries to reassure me and tells me that he doesn't mind, but even if that's true, I know in my heart that it's not right to make him do 80+% of the housework.<br /><br />-CAAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3282788798018689873.post-85549621458299600282011-04-17T13:52:31.603-04:002011-04-17T13:52:31.603-04:00Thanks for commenting! I'm so sorry to hear ab...Thanks for commenting! I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. <br /><br />I truly believe that leaving was the right decision for me, and that there are a lot of other (currently miserable) grad students and faculty out there who would be better off leaving than staying. That's a major reason I started this blog. I know what a relief it was for me to find other people on the internet saying what I was feeling ... I'm hoping I can do the same for other people.<br /><br />But yes, the guilt and occasional worry that I am a failure keeps creeping back into my mind. I don't know how to shake it, but I'm trying.<br /><br />Thanks for reading...JChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04468758055878600762noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3282788798018689873.post-10350199913837980282011-04-15T00:13:01.197-04:002011-04-15T00:13:01.197-04:00Wow. You said everything I'm feeling. I'm ...Wow. You said everything I'm feeling. I'm an ABD history grad, was even working on the dissertation when funding fell out from beneath me, my mom contracted stage iv metastatic breast cancer, and about 5 other things happened to make me decide to leave the PhD program. I'm currently teaching as a part-time instructor, but I feel every single thing you said in this post. Thank you for sharing the thoughts in public.<br />~RJAHistorianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17321639321496219252noreply@blogger.com